Category Archives: Youth Ministry

Compassion Fatigue – Recognize the Signs

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You love this job.

You love the people with whom you get to work, and you love the Lord! So why do you feel like you cannot muster the empathy and sympathy to care as deeply as you should right now? You’re exhausted. I don’t mean sleep-deprived, which is completely possible, but you’ve found that your compassion is exhausted. Can you recognize the signs?

“Compassion Fatigue is a condition characterized by emotional and physical exhaustion leading to a diminished ability to empathize or feel compassion for others.”

source

Signs and symptoms of Compassion Fatigue can mirror Depression and/or PTSD and can include any of the following: Feeling helpless, hopeless, or powerless; irritability; feeling angry, sad, or numb; feeling detached; and/or experiencing a decreased pleasure in usual activities.

You may be thinking, “Maybe I am just burned out. That seems more likely.”

How do we know the difference between Compassion Fatigue and Burnout?

According to Barbara Rubel at the Griefwork Center, Inc., here is how you can tell the difference between Compassion Fatigue and Burnout:
Burnout is typically situational, and only attributed to a stressful work environment; Compassion Fatigue is the result of the impact of helping others, most typically through their trauma. So, could you possibly be experiencing both, especially during a prolonged pandemic? Yes!

This is your reminder to be gentle with yourself and those around you! Many who are in the helping profession or in ministry are deeply feeling the burdens and trauma of others, and as a result you are so good at this job! But you must care for yourself before you can care for others – think of the oxygen mask on the airplane analogy for instance – who do you place the oxygen mask on first? YOU!

Some strategies to combat Compassion Fatigue:

Pay attention to when you feel the most fatigued. What you have you been doing at work prior to this feeling? Begin to identify what drains your battery so that you can then strategize how and when to complete those tasks. This may help you give your all to them without depleting your compassion bank.

Journal about the good, bad, and ugly. Journaling is a safe, effective way to articulate all your feelings and frustrations and to get them out of your head. And you don’t have to worry about how you say something or how it will be received. Be unfiltered!

Take vacation or a day off if you can! Stepping away from the everyday grind can really help you restore your energy and excitement for your work. You started this job for a reason – try to remember what that is!

Schedule time for you. Ministry is a 24/7 calling, but you cannot function for long in that way. Be sure to schedule time that you are not working, not on your phone or social media, and doing things that are life-giving and restorative to you.

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Ask for Help! Tell a safe person, like a coach, friend or counselor, who is not a co-worker, how you are feeling. Ask them to help you see the bigger picture and greater good of the work you are doing. Ask them to keep you accountable in taking time out for yourself.

Actively and intentionally remind yourself of the good you are doing in this job and in this world!

And here’s what might be the hardest strategy:

Set Boundaries for your Compassion. Before there were cell phones and social media, we only knew about bad things happening to people if we watched/read the news, or the situation was happening inside of our family or social circle. We now have access to everyone’s hurts all the time via social media – we see the devastating stories of strangers who die too young from cancer or who have suffered catastrophic loss and need help. It is not wrong to feel for all these people and situations, or to even respond with help; but if you don’t know the person or the people surrounding that person, but sure to set boundaries for your compassion and empathy. Don’t spend all your energy on strangers when you know you need to pour more of yourself into your family, friends, and the people with whom you work every day.

The great news is that you can combat Compassion Fatigue and get back to feeling excited about your calling – but you must actively work towards this! Remember to be gentle with yourself and take time to restore your energy. Set boundaries for yourself and others and be intentional in your everyday actions. This world needs you, especially now!

YMI blog author and music therapist Mallory Even

Mallory Even, LPMT, MT-BC, is a Board-Certified and Licensed Professional Music Therapist. She earned her degree in Music Therapy at The Florida State University, and has owned her private practice, Metro Music Therapy, which is based in Peachtree Corners, GA (NE Atlanta), for over 12 years. Mallory has a heart for using music to serve others, both professionally and personally, and has been a worship leader at various churches in Florida and Georgia throughout the last 20 years.


You can contact Mallory by sending her an email.

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    Lead Well This Year

    Leading Well in 2023
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    We are in another year of ministry. And whether this is your first, fifth, fifteenth, or fiftieth, each year can bring a different challenge. To help you lead well this year, here are a few ideas to remember as you seek to make Christ known in 2023.

    Learn and understand the needs of your group.

    Understanding the unique needs of each individual and their family within the ministry is essential to leading well this year. By understanding their personalities, struggles, and interests, you can tailor your teaching, studies, and events in a more meaningful way. When we, as leaders, lead in a way that meets the needs of those we serve, we will find that the people in ministry are more receptive and engaged.

    Be a student of cultural trends.

    Ask loads of questions about the latest trending song, dance, or other social media trends. For some of us, this may get frustrating – even downright annoying. But taking time to stay aware of these trends helps us relate better with young people. My experience has also shown that asking questions about the latest trends will strengthen your relationship with young people. 

    Be consistent and fair.

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    The quickest way to lose trust is to act inconsistently and unfairly. Leadership often involves controlling emotions in challenging situations. A little work ahead of time can help us in these difficult moments.

    As leaders, we should strive to maintain accountability within the ministry by setting clear expectations and providing consistent follow-through when those expectations are not met. Clear expectations for volunteers, students, student leaders, and ourselves will help you keep a consistent and fair environment. This type of culture is essential in creating trusting relationships with young people and their families.

    Remain prayerful.

    Lastly, to lead well this year and into the future, you must work to deepen your relationship with Jesus through prayer. You know ministry can be challenging. Regularly praying for wisdom and strength will help you think more clearly when facing difficult decisions and enable you to focus on what is most important. And most of all, living into your identity as a child of God is your first role as a leader.

    Rev. Brian Lawson is the Director of Leadership Development and Client Services for YMI and has served in youth ministry since 2004. He also serves as a pastor in the Florida Conference of the UMC. Brian holds a Master of Ministry with a focus in organizational culture, team-based leadership, change, conflict, and peacemaking from Warner University. In addition to his degrees from Warner, he studied Christian Education at Asbury Theological Seminary. Click the social links below to engage with Brian.

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    Job Hunting Mistakes To Avoid

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    You need this job.  You binged the entire Netflix catalog.  Your bedroom/office is becoming smaller every day.  And your budget isn’t going to support your diet of ramen noodles much longer. 

    So why haven’t you found a job yet? 

    Well, it could be a number of reasons.  But try to avoid these common mistakes when job hunting first to see if it makes a difference.

    Job Hunting Mistake #1: Don’t put your picture on your resume. 

    I mean you’re good looking, and the new outfit pops, right?  But that shouldn’t be what gets you your next position.  When people are reading your resume, they make judgments about who you are.  It is much easier to control impressions by the words you write and phrases you use.  A picture, while it is worth 1000 words, is out of your control.  They will make assumptions about you based on that photo. And beauty is always in the eyes of the beholder, and you don’t know who is beholden you.

    I have seen people use pictures that include family members, pets, hobbies, and other activities.  I am convinced they understood why they chose a particular picture.  The problem is that the person reading your resume doesn’t know. 

    You want someone to evaluate you on the experiences you communicate in a resume. 

    That will be how you will get the job.  A picture never helps.  It can only potentially hurt.

    Job Hunting Mistake #2: Not Researching The Church

    It can be easy to send resumes. After all, you may be feeling the crunch of needing a job. However, rushing to apply without doing your research can lead to a bad fit for you and the church. No one wants to end up in a position only to then find out that your beliefs or values do not line up.

    Another important point here, when you fail to research the church, you also put yourself at a disadvantage. Looking up the church, watching sermons, and reading the website or newsletters can all help you gain insights into the congregation’s language and culture. Want to know how to dress for your interviews? Watch sermons and see how the people dress.

    Researching can be an important step in your job hunt, so don’t skip this step.

    Mistake #3: Don’t stop looking. 

    Be sure to be applying for 3-5 jobs per week.  You may get all the way to final interviews with your dream job and find out they can’t pay you enough or you came in a close second. 

    You can’t afford not to have several possible job opportunities going at the same time.  Yes – you will likely experience more rejection than you think your ego can handle.  But ultimately, you are looking for one person to hire you.  And your odds increase with the more positions for which you are applying.

    Job Hunting Mistake #4: Don’t forget your deadlines. 

    You may have to source your references or submit additional written work to a future employer.  Be sure you are agreeing to and meeting the deadlines they are setting for you.  It is a strike against you if you have to be reminded.  And if you are reminded repeatedly, you may want to consider pulling your name from consideration.

    And, finally… Job Hunting Mistake #5: Don’t give up. 

    It may feel impossible to avoid these job hunting mistakes, but… Be patient.  The road to my longest-tenured job began with an interview in October in which I was rated the second choice (I found this out years later).  I was married in December and thought I would inquire about the job in March.  I started in April.  The first choice turned them down.  I stayed interested, and they finally offered me the job.  I never gave up.  Don’t you, either.

    Steve Schneeberger is the Student Ministry Lead Director at the Church of the Resurrection in Leawood, KS, and is the founder of the Youth Ministry Institute. Beginning in 1985, Steve began a vocation as a youth minister serving churches in Kansas and Florida. He is a 1981 graduate of Shawnee Mission West High School in Overland Park, Kansas, has a business degree from Baker University (1985) and a law degree from the University of Kansas (1988). He is married to Carol, a school counselor and former teacher. They have three children.

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    GET READY FOR TOUGH QUESTIONS

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    “Can God create a rock so heavy that He can’t move it?”

    If you’ve ever had a student ask you this question or a question like it, you might have dismissed it. It’s a bit of a silly question, and I’m betting it was probably a silly student who asked it.

    But, if you were to linger on the questions for a bit, you might have had a harder time than you thought to formulate an answer that makes sense. 

    Paradoxical questions are worth thinking about, but could you answer some serious, difficult questions? “If God created everything, who created God?” “How was the Bible made?” “Does God know everything we’re going to do?” Do any of these sound familiar? 

    Those inquiries aren’t just for senior pastors. There are some significant reasons why you as a youth minister or children’s minister should get ready for tough questions.

    IT’S GOOD FOR YOUR FAITH TO GET READY TO ANSWER TOUGH QUESTIONS.

    Odds are, you know WHAT you believe. But do you know WHY you believe it? I know it’s not always easy or pleasant, but wrestling with why you believe what you believe will significantly enrich your faith. 

    You’ll also find your relationship with God to be more vibrant when you start to see and believe that He’s not afraid of your questions and won’t send you away because you ask them.

    Our God is a God who draws near to His people, even in their confusion or doubt. 

    If you want to make it very far in ministry of any kind, you need an active, growing faith of your own. Over time, you’ll find that the muscles of our faith tend to atrophy if we don’t ever get ready to answer tough questions. 

    STUDENTS ARE GOING TO ASK TOUGH QUESTIONS

    If you haven’t had a student ask you a really tough question yet, I promise you it’s coming! These questions are sometimes theoretical and unemotional.

    “How was Jesus God AND man?” “How was the Bible made?”

    But they can also be deeply personal to students.

    “If God is good AND all-powerful, why does He allow school shootings,” “Why would a loving God send anyone to Hell?” 

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    Students may only be aware of the question they’re asking but, there’s something else happening at the same time. They’re allowing you to earn their trust and respect.

    When a student asks you a difficult question, and you have an answer for them, even if it’s only a partial answer, they learn that you have asked yourself these questions before. That means you can relate to them! 

    They’re also going to feel like they can trust you. You just showed them you’re not scared of their questions, and you’re a safe person for them to ask.

    If they asked you their question in front of all the other students, you’ve just become more relatable and trustworthy to everyone, not just the student asking the question.

    That’s a win! 

    BUT DON’T ANSWER ALL OF THEM

    It is such a beautiful thing that God has communicated so many things about Himself to His people. And, you should give a lot of time and energy to knowing what God has said and exploring how you can grow in it, both personally and in your ministry. 

    But, you are doing your students a disservice if the God you expose them to is small enough for them to understand completely.

    Your students need a God that is bigger than they can imagine. Let their minds be blown, at least from time to time, by how incomprehensible God is. 

    Your students will never accurately understand God if they are never challenged to embrace mystery. It’s an essential part of our relationship with Him. 

    As a youth pastor, you should want to foster a safe environment where students can wrestle with tough questions. But, you should also try to respond in ways that help build a sense of wonder. It’s in that tension where you’ll start to see faith come alive in your ministry. 

    Skylar Jones serves as Youth and Family Minister at St. Barnabas Episcopal Church in DeLand, FL. He has worked in many different capacities since he began serving the church nearly 20 years ago. Skylar is married and has a son. He met his wife at Berry College, in Rome, GA, where he graduated with a bachelor’s degree in English. He enjoys sports, music, long walks on the beach, and anything made by Reese’s. Click the social links below to engage with Skylar.

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    Five Ways To Prepare For Next Year

    Five Ways To Prepare For Next Year
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    It’s nearing the end of the calendar year. Some of us are overly busy in Advent and Christmas services, while others are winding down. Regardless of where you are, you can use the final few weeks of this year well. Because the truth is this, it is easy to bury our heads. It is easy not to use this time intentionally. Ultimately, we will be surprised by the following year- as if we didn’t know a new year was coming.

    Using these weeks well can be the difference between a smooth transition into the next calendar year or a headache-riddled season of life.

    To help you experience the joy of a smooth beginning to next year, here are five things you need to be doing in the next few weeks.

    Five Ways To Prepare For Next Year

    Intentional Study

    I hope you will have some free time over the next few weeks. If you do, you have a choice. You can spend it binge-watching every new show, which honestly can be nice at times. Or, you can decide to use a piece of your newfound free time to invest.

    Pick up a book and spend a portion of your time reading. Read something that challenges your faith, beliefs, or skills. Perhaps read about a craft outside of your normal scope. One such example, copywriting.

    I know, you’re thinking copywriting? Isn’t that for marketers? And you’d be correct. However, at its core, copywriting is about communication. After studying the copywriting skill, you will increase your social media caption writing or even make writing those newsletters easier.

    Coffee With A Mentor

    When was the last time you met someone older or more experienced than you for coffee (or tea, or coke)? Or when was the last time you had a safe place to ask questions and get insights you will need in the new year?

    Recently I was gifted with the opportunity to meet with a retired pastor that I respect. We now meet monthly. Even though I have experience in ministry and often coach others, I still greatly benefit from the insights of others. You are never too skilled or experienced to learn from others.

    Reach out to someone, schedule a time to meet. Ask that person to make it a regular meeting with you. And if you need youth or children’s ministry mentoring, we have leadership coaching that would be highly beneficial for you.

    Spend That Budget

    Many churches look to cut budgets. And what will they cut first? The answer is ministries that did not spend their budget the year before.

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    Spending your budget before the end of the year is wise because it helps you keep the same budget level the following year. Spending it now can help ease pressure on the next year’s budget. So make deposits on trips. Explore continuing education opportunities. Invest in leaders or students.

    Whatever you do, find a way to use that budget!

    Invest In Family

    You don’t have to be in ministry long to realize that it requires a lot of sacrifices. Yes, sacrifices on your part. But even more so, sacrifices by your family. 

    Your kids may have missed time with you. Your spouse may need extra attention from you. Listen to them deeply or give extra foot rubs. Perhaps your parents could use a facetime call or visit.

    It is easy to think we are the only ones making sacrifices. But in reality, your family also misses time with you while you are away on trips, concerts, or leading studies. An investment in your family will be good for you, but even more so will greatly benefit your relationship with some of the most significant people in your life.

    Spiritual Formation

    Our spiritual formation often falls flat when we are running through a busy season. Use this extra time to refocus your heart toward Christ. Spend time in prayer – whether this is free-form prayer, Lectio Divina, or using a resource like the book of common prayer (or this one).

    Read scripture or explore the writings of great spiritual formation leaders. Do whatever you need to refill that spiritual tank of yours. We all know the next year is coming, and it will be busy – so prepare now.

    The weeks at the end of the year can be a gift. You can use them well to prepare for the next year. So what will you do, and how will you be prepared to lead and love well next year?

    Rev. Brian Lawson is the Director of Leadership Development and Client Services for YMI and has served in youth ministry since 2004. He also serves as a pastor in the Florida Conference of the UMC. Brian holds a Master of Ministry with a focus in organizational culture, team-based leadership, change, conflict, and peacemaking from Warner University. In addition to his degrees from Warner, he studied Christian Education at Asbury Theological Seminary. Click the social links below to engage with Brian.

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    Four Ways To Sabotage Your Leadership

    Four Ways of Sabotaging Leadership
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    Do you often times feel overwhelmed and wonder how you will get it all done? When you find yourself in this space, it’s easy to fall into unhealthy behaviors that sabotage your leadership.

    Let’s look at four common ways you can unintentionally sabotage yourself.

    Sabotage your leadership by: Doing it alone.

    Do you ever feel like it is all up to you? That people are looking to you to have all the answers? As leaders it is common to feel this internal pressure of needing to have it all together and have all the answers. You know you don’t and yet find yourself wrestling with this internal tension.

    When you lead a ministry, people are looking to you for guidance, to solve problems, and sometimes to have the next big idea that will solve all the ministries problems. This is a lot of pressure. And if you are not careful, the weight of it all can wear you down and cause you to isolate yourself. You can quickly adopt the idea that it is all up to you.   Intellectually, you know this isn’t true. That you can’t do it well alone. And yet, it is easy to find yourself doing just that. You may find yourself thinking, “I’m the only one who can do this right” or “They pay me, so it’s my job to do this.” Your job isn’t to do the children’s or youth ministry. Your job is to lead the church in doing children’s or youth ministry.

    Sabotage your leadership by: Letting your ego get too big.

    Do you find yourself thinking your ideas are better? Of course, you don’t say that out loud, but do you think it? When someone comes to you with an idea, do you find yourself quickly dismissing it, because it doesn’t fit with your way of thinking?  Do you find yourself eager to move on your own idea, and slow to get input from others? If so, these could indicate your ego is in the driver’s seat and may be sabotaging your leadership.

    Only leaning on your own ideas is dangerous.

    When you are working on a new idea, gather a small group of people to brainstorm and dream with you. Be prepared to listen objectively. Chances are you have some emotional attachments to this idea. Having self-awareness around this will enable you to listen without being defensive.

    Involving others will help you share the load and responsibility of moving the ministry forward. This will not only speak value over those in the conversation, it will allow them to take ownership of the process and results.

    Sabotage your leadership by: Thinking more about what you want FROM people versus what you want FOR them.

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    This often times happens when you are feeling desperate for more help.  If you are struggling with recruiting adults to partner with you in ministry, you may want to ask- “do people feel like I am more interested in what they can do for me versus what I want for them.” Even adults are looking for a place where they matter and belong.

    Before you approach someone about serving in the ministry, spend time with them with no agenda. Care about them first. Then as you get to know them, if you think they are still a good fit, invite them to be a part of the work God is doing in the lives of those in the ministry. Speak with them about the value you see they can bring to the ministry and how their talents are an asset to the mission.

    Sabotage your leadership by: Not leaving margin for learning.

    When things get busy, often the first things to go is your personal time connecting with God and making time to grow your leadership. One of the best things you can do for those you lead is investing in your own leadership. This is an important gift to give yourself! It is also vitally important for your own spiritual, emotional, and relational health.

    Here are a few questions to ask yourself to access this: 1. Outside of ministry, when was the last time you felt inspired by being in God’ presence? 2. Where is God challenging you to grow right now? 3. What new muscles are you developing in your own leadership?

    If you are looking for a supportive community that will encourage you, get to know you, and challenge you to grow, the Youth Ministry Institute has a Professional Certification for Children and Youth Ministers. This Certification Program will give you the tools you need to succeed in ministry. We believe in you and the important work you do! We’d be honored to walk alongside you in your leadership journey.

    Kirsten Knox, Senior Director of Ministry Partnerships

    Kirsten Knox is the Executive Director of Youth Ministry Institute. Kirsten was part of the second class to complete the Youth Ministry Institute two-year coaching and training class in 2009. She has since been a coach on multiple occasions. Kirsten Knox is married and a graduate of Asbury University with a degree in youth ministry.  She began working in youth ministry in 2000, serving Pasadena Community United Methodist Church for a decade and still ministers to young people at Radius Church in St. Petersburg, FL. Click the social links below to engage with Kirsten.

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    Incorporating Youth Into Worship Leadership

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    Just as a body, though one, has many parts, but all its many parts form one body, so it is with Christ. For we were all baptized by one Spirit so as to form one body—whether Jews or Gentiles, slave or free—and we were all given the one Spirit to drink. Even so the body is not made up of one part but of many.

    1 Corinthians 12: 12-14 (KJV)

    When I was younger, I was part of a church that was thriving in a growing community. The youth ministry had just launched. It was building sustainability every year as more and more students began to buy into what the church was doing in the community and through the youth ministry. The church was a young church, meeting in a Boys and Girls Club gymnasium. Students, including myself, were passionate about helping to serve.

    Each weekend, a group of students would come together to set up the chairs, the stage, and the sound equipment. This was our way of being a part of the mission of our local church—to be disciples that make disciples.

    Worship plays a vital role in the weekly service for many churches. We come together as one body to give praise and adoration to God for who He is and what He is doing. Churches all around plan their worship with intentionality by selecting songs that connect with the congregation and fit the pastor’s sermon for that day. There is purpose with the audio and visuals of the service—creating announcement videos, setting up short bumper videos before the sermon, determining what graphics should be used as backgrounds in the songs, and creating an atmosphere with lighting and stage design.

    How about the people that are leading the congregation into worship? How often are we just as intentional with the people that we choose? Are we incorporating youth into the worship leadership?

    Why aren’t youth in worship leadership?

    You may relate, but churches, all-around, are struggling to figure out how to get young people plugged into the church. Though I don’t have all the answers, I do know it has to go beyond door prizes, fun games, and giving them free food. There is something that students want—they want to be known. They want to be loved. They want to belong.

    Churches that want to pour into teens must show that teens belong, not just in youth ministry, but in the church. Their leadership, voice, talents, and gifts are valued and needed to help build Christ’s church.

    How can we empower youth in worship leadership?

    One of the most empowering things a church can do for teens is giving them a chance to lead worship on Sunday mornings. I know churches will have “youth services” once a quarter. Those are great. Services that show off your youth ministry and how God works through students’ lives are important for the rest of the church to see.

    However, what would it be like to intentionally incorporate youth into worship leadership alongside adults weekly?

    When students lead, whether by playing guitar, playing drums, or singing, alongside adults, it shows that your church values their talents and gifts. It shows that your church is about bridging the gap between generations.

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    It’s not about playing the most hype and newest Hillsong Young & Free song. It’s about creating a culture where youth belong in the church. The church that models 1 Corinthians 12:12–26, I believe, will reach young people and families the most because they are operating as one body.

    The church is one body.

    Too many youth ministries operate as separate entities from their churches. There is the “big” church, and there is the youth ministry. If you are like me, I have a lot of students that attend my student ministry but do not attend church service.

    When I first came on staff at my current church eight years ago, the youth ministry met on Sunday mornings during service. It sounds like a good idea for a lot of churches. We had a great turnout of students, and maybe you do too. However, I felt convicted that something needed to change.

    We are teaching students that youth ministry is separate, possibly implying that church is boring. So come have fun with us in our youth ministry. We are keeping them from experiencing and worshipping WITH the church body.

    When students graduate from high school, they are looking for a church. What are they going to look for? You’re right, they will be looking for an experience and environment that resembles their student ministry. This is why it’s so important to make it our mission as youth pastors to get students involved in the whole church.

    They need to be needed in the church. So, church leaders, give them a chance.

    Allow them to lead. Worship is a beautiful way for students to be used because they have so much talent. They have so much to offer. Empower them to use their gifts and let them own them. Use this as an opportunity to disciple them. Teach them the importance of leading with humility and integrity. Encourage them to embrace the value of practice and teamwork in a worship setting. Teach them to own their gifts and use them to bring glory to Jesus.

    Go beyond the stage to put youth in leadership.

    Lastly, I will challenge you to go beyond the stage. We should be incorporating youth into all kinds of worship leadership roles if you are willing to train them and use them. They can be used in audio, video, lighting, livestream, as greeters, ushers, coffee team, parking team, and many more. Use them because they belong.

    Chris has served at First Church Coral Springs as the Director of Student Ministries for 8 years. He is a graduate from Dallas Theological Seminary with his Masters in Christian Education and a Youth Ministry Institute Alumnus. He is passionate about discipling young people to become future leaders in the church.

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      From Summer Hustle to School Year Rhythm

      From Summer To Fall
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      For many of us, our summer ministry has ended.

      You may have led an incredible VBS, inspiring mission trip, or even had life-changing experiences at summer camp. Now is the time we move from the hustle of summer into the more rhythmic school year.

      So how do we help teens, children, families, our teams, and the congregation remember the meaningful experiences from this summer? After all, if they don’t remember, did it even happen? Okay, that may be a bit dramatic. But you get the idea. We must consider how we can help them remember these meaningful experiences. 

      But how can we keep summer memories all year?

      Here are four quick thoughts on how you can help them carry these summer ministry experiences into the school year.

      First, tell the stories.

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      Stories are important and have the power to transform us. They can help a young person remember their experience or even encourage the finance committee to approve your budget request.

      Find every avenue you can to share the stories from this summer. You may share these stories in service, through video, as quotes over social media, as student testimonies at youth group, or in adult Sunday school classes. In whatever avenue you can find, tell the stories.

      Two, let summer experiences influence school year ministry.

      Was there a popular random object from a trip? Did the children at VBS talk about a new dance move or song? Was there a particular teaching focus this summer? Were young people moved by the people they served?

      Find ways to integrate those experiences into your school programming. Perhaps they change your teaching focus or the types of games you will play. Maybe you realized over the summer that you need to help your group bond more. You may decide to do fewer stage games and more trust activities.

      Third, Seek Out Meetings With Families.

      Often young people go home and tell their parents, “camp was great.” And those are the only words the parents get – three little words even when you know that the teen’s experience is worth hundreds of words. 

      Have coffee with parents and brag about their child. Share with them what you saw in their child this summer or what you talked about at VBS. Give parents ideas on encouraging continued growth in their young person.

      Fourth, Take Notes.

      I mean, take lots and lots of notes. Write about your experiences with different children or teens. In what ways did you see their growth? Later you can use these notes to encourage them.

      But more than just notes about young people, take notes about the events. What went well? What did not go well? How can these things inform how you do ministry over the school year and even next summer?

      Rev. Brian Lawson is the Director of Leadership Development and Client Services for YMI and has served in youth ministry since 2004. He also serves as a pastor in the Florida Conference of the UMC. Brian holds a Master of Ministry with a focus in organizational culture, team-based leadership, change, conflict, and peacemaking from Warner University. In addition to his degrees from Warner, he studied Christian Education at Asbury Theological Seminary. Click the social links below to engage with Brian.

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      Four Strategic Decisions For Summer Ministry

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      Ministry in the summer can fly by. Summer can feel like a whirlwind from ending the school year, celebrating graduations, jumping into camps or mission trips, assisting VBS, and family vacations. And before we know it, we’ve lost a golden opportunity. So I wonder, have you thought through how you are using summer? I believe each summer, we should choose a few things to focus on as leaders. Here are just a few that you may want to consider implementing in your summer ministry this year.

      FOUR STRATEGIC DECISIONS FOR SUMMER MINISTRY

      Choose The Small Moments In Summer Ministry

      There will be many small moments throughout the summer, and you do not want to miss them. What are small moments? 

      Small moments look like walking with a student as you carry game supplies back to the bus, waiting for a ride, or setting up for VBS. These situations create opportunities for you to ask questions and hear a young person’s heart. You can help them feel seen, heard, and acknowledged. These conversations can be a catalyst toward spiritual development and even inspire them to take on a level of leadership like never before.

      During the school year, these moments are more challenging to find. But in the summer, there will be many opportunities to connect on an individual level with a young person. 

      Create Opportunities For Leadership During Summer Ministry

      Want to see young people leading more in your ministry? You do that by giving them opportunities. Notice, I didn’t say you do that by ensuring they will succeed. You give them opportunities to lead in both success and failure.

      Summer provides us with the chance to let young people lead games, devotions, snacks, prayer, and more. Why is summer a great place for this? Because ministry that happens in the summer is often smaller and feels less risky. 

      Take advantage of the less risky feel of summer and give young people a chance to lead. Walk with them through the planning, execution, and evaluation of how the activity went. Using this time wisely will prepare them to be a leader during the school year.

      Support Other Ministries

      We all have important things to accomplish during the summer. I understand that. But have you ever considered summer as an opportunity to build credit and relationships with others in the church?

      If you’re in youth ministry, summer is an excellent time to volunteer in and support the children’s ministry. Consider this; those children will be teens before you know it. Imagine how much better their transition into the youth ministry will be if they already have a relationship with you.

      How about supporting an adult ministry? Consider participating in an adult service project or Sunday School class. This action will help you build credit with the adults – credit that may someday pay off if you need extra support. You may also find new volunteers or individuals who want to fund a portion of your ministry.

      And let’s be honest. We’re around young people a lot. Spending time with other adults will help us be more well-rounded people.

      Remember Rest & Family

      For some of us, the summer is the perfect opportunity to rest. Wait, let me correct that statement. The summer provides us and even calls all of us to rest.

      A rested you and a better prepared you. Make sure you schedule blocks of time to nap, read a book that encourages your soul, build a table, or lounge on the beach. Find ways to remind you of the critical fact that we all often forget – you are beloved by God regardless of your work.

      And perhaps, most of all, find ways to spend time with your family. Show love and support, and be there for and with them.

      Regardless of how long you’ve been in ministry, we must constantly be making large and small decisions. These decisions should be defined in the summer by how we want our relationships to go, what will keep us in ministry longer, and how we can set ourselves up for success in the coming school year. 

      Rev. Brian Lawson is the Director of Leadership Development and Client Services for YMI and has served in youth ministry since 2004. He also serves as a pastor in the Florida Conference of the UMC. Brian holds a Master of Ministry with a focus in organizational culture, team-based leadership, change, conflict, and peacemaking from Warner University. In addition to his degrees from Warner, he studied Christian Education at Asbury Theological Seminary. Click the social links below to engage with Brian.

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      When Rules Are Broken & Consequences Are Necessary

      Rules Are Broken & Consequences Are Necessary
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      We’ve all had it happen.

      You’re leading a group of teens on a weekend retreat. Let’s say you’ve got 25 teens and six adults (in addition to yourself) attending. You’ve been planning this trip for months. You have made reservations at a beach house, completed all the necessary background checks, filled out all the paperwork, and prepared all the necessary lessons. In a meeting prior to the retreat, you clearly state the rules and expectations for behavior for the young people and adults attending. In this meeting, you also make it clear what will happen when rules are broken and consequences are necessary.

      Now, it’s finally the day! You get to the beach house, teens and adults find their rooms and you find yourself settling into the schedule. Your adults are where they are needed, and you have a moment of joy as things seem to be going well.

      It’s time for lights out. You have settled into bed for some quiet reading when there is a knock at the door. You open it to find one of your adult leaders standing there with two teenagers. They’ve snuck out of their rooms and have been caught.

      You know these teens. One of them is a well-behaved kid with great respect for the rules. The other, well, they have been known to get in trouble from time to time.

      What do you do when rules are broken and consequences are necessary?

      Disciplining our young people can be challenging, especially if you are like me and really hate hurting people’s feelings. But, as leaders of teens, we know consequences are a necessity.

      We know discipline is needed to keep our young people safe, to help keep order in a world where things can easily run toward chaos, and to help teens feel loved.

      When faced with disciplining our teens there are some things to keep in mind.

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      Were the rules clear?

      Did the established rules cover the given scenario? Were the rules clearly communicated? Were consequences set and clear?

      The first week of August was our first annual Youth Week. We had a week packed with events and service opportunities. To wrap up the week we had our annual lock-in. After all the young people arrived and before the games started, I made sure to sit everyone down and talk about the expectations for the evening.

      I made it clear that our adult leaders were in charge, that their word was law, and I would not hesitate to call parents at 3:00 am to come to pick up their child if they could not respect the rules.

      One of my high schoolers looked at me then and said, “Ms. Sarah, you always say that, but you never actually do it.”

      I looked back at him and said, “That’s because you guys don’t make consequences necessary by breaking rules. Usually, the warning is enough. But if you feel the need to test it…”

      Who are the Teens Involved in the Rule Breaking?

      While you want to be clear that the rules are understood by the group at large, as leaders we can not ignore the individual. Maybe one teen has broken a rule for the first time. Maybe one teen is notorious for pushing the limit, for stepping out of bounds. Even if they acted together, and even if consequences were made clear, we should not ignore the individual circumstances.

      Knowing the motivations behind the behavior can help us as leaders to know how to guide our young people with compassion and curiosity.

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      Motivations and Applying Necessary Consequences

      That said, it can be hard to apply a blanket consequence when keeping the individuals in mind.

      Take the above scenario and the two students who snuck out. Maybe one student, known for being a rule-breaker, is dealing with an issue at home. As much as we hope to know our youth well, we might be unaware of this issue. Maybe they have confided in their friend – the friend they snuck out with – the friend known to be a strict rule follower. This is why it is important to know your teens well- their lives, their personalities, their struggles, and their families.

      Considering their actions individually is important and may impact the discipline given. However, it is important to apply necessary consequences when rules are broken for all parties to build trust among the group.

      One Last Thing When Rules Are Broken

      It is never okay to embarrass teens in front of their peers. Punishing a teen without knowing the full situation has the potential to backfire. Teens should never be publicly shamed or embarrassed because of something they have done.

      Always discuss the behavior with a young person privately. And always include parents and guardians in these discussions as well. And ALWAYS allow room for God’s love and forgiveness (and yours) to shine through!

      Sarah Taylor has been the youth director at Gulf Cove United Methodist Church in Port Charlotte, Florida, since 2017. She has a Master’s Degree in Youth Ministry from Wesley Seminary as well as a Master of Fine Arts in Creative Writing. She loves books and writing, has a borderline obsession with Harry Potter and Gilmore Girls, and loves Cherry Pepsi. She lives in North Port, Florida, with her 14-year-old cat, Milo.

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